Monday, April 21, 2008

Why God invented Valium

One other thing I should have put in the 7 things meme is that I'm totally freaked out by things coming near my eyes. Remember Rachel from Friends?

Here she is having an eye exam:

Totally me, but I don't swear. I cry.

And here she is getting eye drops:

Don't believe me? Ask my eye doctor. Or my husband who once had to put goop in my eyes for two weeks.

I also don't do very well with strep tests where they swab your throat, or flu tests where they swab your nose. But those are for another post some day.

So why am I bringing this up now? Because I have to leave in 15 MINUTES to go to the eye doctor to have eye plugs put in. It's a minor procedure. Everyone—every, single person—I've talked to about this says it's no big deal. Of course, most of them have no problem with wearing contacts either.

Anyway, my doctor—who is so wonderful to have put up with me for years (and I have an eye disease that causes me to go see him twice a year, so he really, really earns his fee)—prescribed some Valium to get me through this. I am to take one right before I leave home.

My conscious mind knows it's stupid to be so uptight about this. However, my conscious mind has absolutely NO CONTROL over my emotional mind or my involuntary reflexes which go into hyper-drive the minute I walk into the eye exam room.

Right now, I'm doing slow breathing exercises so I won't totally freak out and have a panic attack or something. Keep your fingers crossed that I don't do something to embarrass myself in public—like crying in the waiting room or wetting my pants while in the exam chair.

Update—7:45 p.m.: All went well. The Valium did its job and while I was still very nervous, I didn't kick or bite the doctor. It took a little over an hour because an "intern" type guy was putting the plugs in. He couldn't get them to go in so my regular eye doctor had to come do it.

They put some drops in my eyes to numb them, then pulled the lower lid down to expose the tear duct, then poked in a silicone plug. The idea is that it will stop my natural tears from draining so quickly and cure my dry eyes. (I don't feel like I have dry eyes, but the doctor said it looked like someone had taken a Brillo pad to my eyes and if I didn't do something soon it could cause permanent damage.)

The inside corners of my eyes feel a little itchy, but other than that, no pain. And every so often, my eyes will just start crying for no reason. Both symptoms should go away in just a few days.


Tristi Pinkston said...

Good luck with this!

Although I do need to ask, what's an eye plug?

Sandra said...

So how did it go? I wish I could have taken the day off to go with you and remind you to breath or at least distract you.

Kenna said...

I know this is like really bad blog etiquette, but I'm using this comment for yourmost recent 3 posts.

I just laughed so hard on the Friends clips. And she is SO exactly like you with her eyes. Remember me once trying to put mascara on you? Man you steamed me. Why wouldn't you just hold still!?!?!????

And... so true on the outfit thing, except those outfits you chose (especially Scarlet's) were SO cute. There's an art to TheShabby.

Summer said...

Oh that does not sound fun. I would be way nervous too.

Marcia Mickelson said...

Hope your eyes get to feeling better soon.

Julie Wright said...

I worked in optical for years. Believe me,the doctors are used to scared patients and deal with it regularly enough that they don't even really think about it. The plugs are awesome! I love modern medicine.